First sketch 3rd Orchestral invention

I like my celesta solo ideas but the work has correspondences a very important compositional technique used in all the arts. Rimbaud talked about it in his poetry.The thing I want is a sensational transition.Big orchestral episodes like JohnWilliams american music.
I been studying the scores to Ravel's Daphne et Chloe, Schonberg 's 5 orchestral pieces and the Berg violin concerto .I really need a university composer's help. I compose at the piano but recently the ideas are just not there.I'm getting small effects but without the integrity of even a minor Webern. Brass could be so much more interesting I love their low sounds. Is there a way to get flutter tonguing from a trombone or flute here. I would love to hear that sound in this piece during the scale for winds and strings. I keep thinking of a couch thats been burned thats the image -sound i want after the opening.Its not there ...yet.I will just keep working at this and try to polish it & make something bigger ,effulgent and blistering.